Since the day we moved to our own apartment, I noticed some changes. I have become a certified housekeeper making sure that everything is available in the house. From buying groceries up to some enamel cookware needed for the household, I look after them.When there are things to be repaired, I also make sure that things are taken care of. It isn’t easy but fulfilling when you manage your own household. It’s a different feeling. It is some kind of an achievement knowing you have something that you can call your “own” at least.

I hope someday, I’ll be a housekeeper of my own house, not an apartment but our own.

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We talk about “age” in the office a lot and that somehow makes me think how my children would treat us when we grow older. Would they think of us a lot even after having their own families? Would they even offer of getting us senior life insurance? Would they bother to ask how we are doing as we reach the seniority age of 60 or would they simply dump us in some home cares just like the others? Call me sensitive or paranoid but these thoughts are already stuck in my mind. What if they chose the latter one? That would hurt a lot but I’m sure I can’t do anything about it.

I also wonder if they will give in to our last wishes like the songs to be played during the funeral, the clothes that we prefer or something else that we have requested from them. Oh well, I got more time I know but these thoughts somehow occupy my mind a lot.

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I had a serious conversation with my husband months ago, and asked him if he still wants another baby after Erchelle and he was kinda okay about it, thinking we’d have a baby boy if I’d get pregnant again. He even told me if he gets an increment next year, he’d probably want one more kid. I laughed about it coz they get salary increase every year so meaning he really wants another baby. If it weren’t for the struggle I had gone through, I would definitely want another one.

Until now I am still puzzled how it happened. Why did I have to go through a C-sec delivery, to think I had taken complete prenatal vitamins, had my monthly check-ups, followed every single instruction my OB had given me, yet, I still went through a hard labor.

To be honest, getting pregnant again is not on my list. Unless I could still have one 7 years after.

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Yep, you read my title right. I lost another 2lbs in less than a month. Of course not, I didn’t take any apidexin pills or anything similar yet. It just so happened that I don’t get enough sleep at night and I get up at 3am everyday. When I work and stay up late at night, the effect is just too fast. Even if I eat rice 3x a day, it just won’t affect my diet. Well, I’m glad my metabolism cooperates well, otherwise, I’d be crying now for gaining so much weight.

However, I don’t like the fast effect that is happening now. My bulges are still there and I can’t do anything about it as yet. I still can’t do sits up until next year. So imagine a slim built with bulges? Ah! Now that’s not nice!

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Now that I have two girls, my goal is to learn more about parenting and household management, that includes budgeting and keeping up with the things needed in the household.

I know that going full time at work is not a very wise decision when you have a 6 month old baby to nurse and taken care of, but a practical one I believe. Though my husband provides well, the thought of losing his job scares me a lot. You’ll never know what’s going to happen next. It’s always a good practice to have a back up whether you need it or not.

Downside: I always miss the development of my kids. I don’t get to bathe them. I don’t get to feed each meal. I don’t get to comfort them when they badly need me. I don’t get to watch them closely as they run around the yard.

Sad but sacrifices help a lot at times.

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